12 Self Esteem And Self Love Tips For A New Positive Self Image
The way that you think and feel about yourself is more important than anything else. If you have continuous negative doubts about yourself then this will affect everything that you do in your life. Achieving your desires will be a lot tougher, and you will repel the Law of Attraction with this negativity.
A lot of books about self esteem really don’t deliver practical solutions to the problem. They fail to tackle the root of the problem and really tackle the issue which is “I can’t love myself”. In this article we will discuss practical self esteem and self confidence boosters that really work.
If you can’t love yourself then how can you expect others to love you? The answer is that you can’t. In today’s society there are so many people who do not have a high enough opinion of themselves, who they are and what they do. To put this into context consider these quotes on self confidence:
“Self confidence is the most attractive quality a person can have. How can anyone see how great you are if you can’t see it yourself?” – Kushandwisdom
“You have to believe in yourself when no one else does – that makes you a winner right there” – Venus Williams
“Be proud of who you are and not ashamed of how others see you”
“Self confidence is the foundation of all great success and achievement”
“What you think of yourself is much more important than what people think of you”
“Nothing holds you back more than your own insecurities” – Kushandwisdom
“Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings” – Samuel Johnson
“I am not what has happened to me. I am what I choose to become” – Carl Jung
“A strong positive self image is the best possible preparation for success in life” – Dr Joyce Brothers
“Loving yourself naturally leads to an increase in self confidence” – Cassie Parks
These quotes should be enough to convince you that positive self esteem is worth pursuing. Below you will see the benefits of participating in self esteem activities and learning self love techniques to boost your self confidence.
The Major Benefits of Improving your Self Image
There are so many benefits of learning to love yourself and participating in self esteem building activities. Here are some of the major advantages:
Everything that you do will be Simpler and Easier
When your self respect improves everything that you do will be easier and simpler. With greater self confidence you will be able to make decisions easier and faster. You will be able to focus on the things that are really important, rather than allowing the smallest things in life dominate your thoughts.
If you make a mistake (as we all do) then you will be able to learn from it and not beat yourself up over it. None of us are perfect and every time that you beat yourself up you spark off a huge amount of negativity. Negativity is the true enemy of success, and it will prevent you from manifesting what you want and leading a truly happy life.
You won’t need other People’s Attention so much
When you can truly say “I love myself” there will be no need for you to constantly crave attention from others. You opinion of yourself has been elevated so much that you will truly stand alone. This will not keep people away from you. They will be attracted to you with your new self image.
Raising self esteem provides you with more inner stability. At the moment it is likely that you are experiencing an emotional rollercoaster that fluctuates with the opinions of others. You will transform from a “needy” person to a totally self reliant one. Being reliant on others is not a place that you want to be.
You will Stop Sabotaging yourself
A lot of people self sabotage when they are nearing success because they feel they are not worthy of it. This is a typical sign of low self esteem and low self confidence. When you discover true self love you will feel a lot more deserving of the good things in life, and the temptation to self sabotage will fade away.
When you love yourself enough your drive for the things that you desire increases. You will have a lot more motivation to succeed, and you will send out the right vibrations to the Universe to manifest what you want. Get rid of your self sabotage tendencies by dealing with low self esteem.
You will be so much Happier
If these benefits were in order (which they are not) then this would be at the top of the list. When you learn how to self love your self belief improves and you will feel so much happier in your life. This is why you need to work on your self esteem activities regularly to keep your self confidence as high as possible.
Your Attractiveness Factor will go Way Up
You want to be more attractive right? This is not just about sexual attractiveness but making more friends and being the person that everybody wants to be with. Follow the self love tips in this article and you will find that you become like a magnet to people. As your self confidence increases so will your circle of friends.
Self Esteem Tips for a New You
Now we come to the exciting part. 12 practical self esteem tips that you can use each day that are the steps to loving yourself. Use these self esteem building activities regularly and you will not believe the transformation of your self image.
Neutralizing your Inner Critic
Every single one of us has an inner critic. It is that tiny voice in your head that tells you that you are useless, you always make mistakes and that you are generally unattractive (and other negative things as well). People with low self esteem issues always listen to their inner critic and are heavily influenced by it. You need to stop this now!
Your inner critic is not all bad so you need to know when to control it. It can drive you forward to achieve something if you are slacking. It can also coerce you into doing things to make the people in your life love you more. But the negative side of your inner critic will result in a lack of self confidence if you don’t take control of it.
Is it possible to control your inner critic? Of course it is! These are thoughts inside your own head. You are the only person that can stop these negative thoughts influencing you. Nobody else can do that for you. And it is something that you must do to for improving your self esteem.
Have you ever experienced these kinds of destructive thoughts?
- You will never be able to do that
- You will never succeed
- You are lazy and useless and will never achieve anything
- Your job performance is poor and you will get the sack
- You are too ugly to attract that boy / girl
- You mess up everything that you do
- You always give up on things
This is just a small sample of the negative thoughts that your inner critic can muster. The good news is that you don’t have to accept these criticisms. In fact it is essential that you don’t! The way to deal with these negative thoughts is to neutralize them with positive ones. This is easy to do and will go a long way to raising your self esteem.
The first thing that you need to do when these kinds of thoughts enter your mind is to break the pattern. You need to stop the inner critic dead in its tracks. So as soon as the thought enters your head shout “Enough” or “Stop”. Choose your own word for this. It can be more than one word such as “no this is not true”. Try some different words to see what works the best.
Once you have stopped the negative thought it is now time to replace it with a positive thought. So if the thought was “you will never be able to do that” you will need to stop the thought and then replace it with something like “I can do this. I can do anything”. Keep the positivity flowing by doing something positive directly afterwards.
This is a very simple and effective way to increase self confidence. Positive thoughts have a stronger effect on us than negative thoughts do, so practice this self esteem technique every time your inner critic strikes. In no time you will have total control over your inner critic and this will be a great self esteem booster.
Take a Break to Appreciate Yourself
This is one of the best building self esteem activities that you can do. The main reason is that it is a lot of fun and will easily become a habit for you. The other positive thing about this technique is that it will only take you a couple of minutes every day to do. This is your “love myself” time and it will make a huge difference to your self esteem if you do it consistently.
Ok here is what you need to do. Relax and take a deep breath and then ask yourself the following question – what are 3 things that I really appreciate about myself?
This works better if you write the answers down in a journal. Everyday come up with different answers to the question. Here are some examples of answers that you may come up with:
- I always help people and make them laugh
- I work hard and have a plan for my future
- I am developing new skills which will provide me with a better life
You get the idea. These can be small or big things it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that they are positive statements about yourself that will make you feel better about yourself. Remember you have to love yourself before you can command love from others, and this is a great way to do it.
You will always be able to come up with ideas with this. Think back over your day and zero in on those activities where you were great. Maybe your boss handed you a challenge and you were able to deliver on it. Or you helped somebody out in some way. Asking this question each day will turn any negative mood into a positive one very quickly.
Stop being a Perfectionist
If you are a perfectionist then you will create a number of negative thoughts about yourself that will provide a low self worth in no time. Striving for perfection every time can seriously dampen your enthusiasm to try anything new. Eventually it will stop you taking action with everything – even if you are good at it.
Believing that your work is “not up to standard” will fuel the flames of procrastination. People with low self esteem tend to procrastinate about everything and this creates a viscous circle that you need to break out of.
You may be a perfectionist who takes action but is always disappointed with the results. This will lead to a rush of negative thoughts and you will soon have no self confidence. Eventually this will take its toll on your ability to take action, as you will want to avoid these negative thoughts swirling around in your mind.
To overcome perfectionism you need to fully accept that you are not perfect and nor is anybody else. You will make mistakes and that is fine. Change your thinking about mistakes and treat them as a learning opportunity rather than abject failure.
Do you think that the self made millionaires in our world never made a mistake and always did everything perfectly? Of course they didn’t! And what about those top athletes or famous movie stars? Do you think they made mistakes (and continue to do so)? You better believe it!
When you are taking action aim for whatever you are doing to be “acceptable” rather than perfect. Remember that in most instances you will be able to rectify mistakes later. When you adopt the “acceptable” mentality you stop giving yourself reasons to procrastinate. Also with this frame of mind you will be able to reflect on what you have done and be satisfied.
Turn Failures into Opportunities
This follows directly on from the perfectionism tip. When you fail at something you want to be able to put a positive spin on it rather than wallow in self pity and kick off a ton of negative thoughts that will drain your energy and sink your self esteem.
When you are positive about failure you will be building your self esteem. If you just do things in life that you are good at then you will never move out of your comfort zone. When you move out of your comfort zone you will have a lot of learning to do, and mistakes and failures are inevitable.
Did you know that Walt Disney failed over 300 times to raise money for his Disneyland Park idea? Well it’s true, and if he let this destroy his self confidence then Disneyland parks would not exist today. He found an upside with all of the failures and moved onto the next finance house to raise the money that he needed.
And that is what you need to do with failure – find an upside. Let’s say that you have created your very first website but some of the functionality doesn’t work. Instead of beating yourself up over this take a step back and realize what you have done. You have created your very first website! This is a great step forward.
Now take a look at what is wrong and look for opportunity. Don’t focus on the hassle and the time that it is going to take to put it right. Instead think of this as an opportunity to learn a lot more about website creation. This will inspire you to drive on and fix the problems and you will always love yourself for finding the answers and making it happen.
Use the law of Reciprocation
One good turn deserves another. If you help someone without reward then you will feel good about yourself and it will boost self confidence. It will also kick in the Law of Reciprocation, and the person that you have helped will want to help you in return.
Become a good listener and be prepared to help others by listening to them speak about their problems. If you can help them by providing solutions to their problems then they will be your friend forever. Use empathy rather than sympathy. You are not there to say “oh you poor thing” because this is likely to drive them deeper into negativity.
Instead empathize by telling them that you understand their situation. Tell them what you would do if you were in the same situation. Make them laugh if you can by cracking jokes about yourself.
Doing little things for people will also make you feel good about yourself and they will feel good towards you. This can be as simple as holding a door open for someone or helping them carry something.
Get out of your Comfort Zone
Motivate yourself to try something new. This can be a small or a big challenge that takes you outside of your comfort zone. When you do this you will experience high self esteem because you have pushed yourself to do it.
It doesn’t matter how doing this new thing turns out. The point is that you had a go, and this is a lot better for your self confidence than not trying anything that you are not truly comfortable with.
Some things that you do out of your comfort zone you will love and want to do again so that you can become really good at it. Take the creation of a website example above. Before you started you had absolutely no idea how to create a website and make it live on the Internet. You found out how to do it and your first website is now live. Congratulate yourself and do it again.
Stop Comparing yourself with Others
It is natural to compare yourself with others but if you want to boost your self esteem then you need to stop doing this. This habit can be very destructive and create a lot of negativity and self doubt. If you play this game you will never win.
Think about it. There will always be someone else that has more money than you or is better at doing something than you are. If one of your colleagues at work has just spent a lot of money on a new car then don’t be envious. Who knows what kind of debt they may be in now because of this purchase.
The best way to stop comparing with other people is to compare with yourself. Think back a year ago and revel in how far you have come since then. Think about those things that you do really well and challenge yourself to do even better by this time next year. This is one of the best self esteem boosters out there.
Keep a Journal
Writing down how you are developing in a journal each day is a great way to overcome poor self esteem. Record all of your triumphs however small. You will be able to look back over the pages of your journal in the future, and if you want to know how to love yourself more this is a very good way.
Commit to making a journal entry at the end of each day. This doesn’t have to be a novel. If you believe that you have to write a lot then this can have a negative impact on you and you may procrastinate. Just write a few “one liners” about good experiences.
Let’s keep with our website creation example. Think about the steps that you took to get this going. Some examples maybe:
- I learned the difference between an HTML website and a content management system like WordPress
- I learned how to order a domain name and web hosting
- I changed the DNS addresses for my domain name so that it connected with my web hosting
- I installed WordPress on my domain name and added a theme
- I wrote my first post and published it
- I now have a live website!
These are small steps that may have taken you a couple of days to achieve. How many people do you think know how to create their own website and make it live on the Internet? Not as many as you think, so you can give yourself a huge pat on the back for being ahead of the crowd.
Develop more positive Motivational Habits
If you are overweight you know that changing your diet and going to the gym will provide great benefits for you. But you are in a state of mind where sitting on the couch eating chips and watching some meaningless junk on TV is your preferred option. You know that this is no good, and the negative thought process begins and you start to feel worthless.
You need to change your motivation habits so that they empower you. Whatever it is that you know you need to do focus on the benefits of doing it. If it is diet and exercise then the benefits will be a healthier you, a thinner you and a more attractive you. All of these things will provide your strong reason “why”.
Just having a list of goals or desires is useless without having emotion attached to them. Without a strong “why” a diet will seem like starvation, and regular trips to the gym will seem like torture. But if you imagine yourself thinner and being more attractive to the opposite sex, this will transform your thinking and you will be inspired to take action.
Every time that you take action towards your goal you will feel good about yourself. Don’t forget to record it in your journal at the end of the day. This is a great way of developing self esteem as you will be very proud of yourself pushing through procrastination and starting that diet. Take a bow.
Become more Confident by Doing the Right Thing
It is rare that you do not know the right thing to do. When you do the right thing by yourself or someone else then your self esteem will receive a massive boost. This can be a really small thing like showing someone understanding rather than judging them. Or it can be a big thing such as deciding to change your life for the better.
Doing the right thing is not always easy. Sometimes you may not even know what the right thing to do is. But if you maintain your focus on this and always strive for it then you will love yourself a lot more and become very self confident.
Write down your Positive Attributes
When you write down a list of your positive attributes you will be focusing on the things that you really admire about yourself. These can be skills, mannerisms, and your character – anything that is positive. Don’t worry that you are not the world champion at something. If you are a good swimmer then write that down.
When you do this you also remind yourself that you are a much better person than your negative inner voice tries to tell you. Read through the attributes and congratulate yourself for being such a great person. Keep this list somewhere that you can see it often and add to it when you have a new attribute. This is a great way to build your confidence.
Avoid negative People and seek out those that will Support you
There are just some people out there that will bring you down all of the time. These people find a way to complain about everything, and if they have a negative impact on you then you need to do everything in your power to avoid them.
This is especially important when you are in the early stages of developing your self esteem. If there are other people that bring you down then avoid them as well. People that call you “fat” or other names are a good example. As your self confidence grows you will be able to handle these people with ease, but when you are starting out don’t take the risk.
Gravitate towards people that love you and support you. Members of your family and close friends are a good starting point. Tell them about your plans and how you are on course to becoming a much more self confident person. You should receive as lot of positivity and encouragement for this, and you will develop healthy self esteem.
Easily Remove Negativity with the 15 Minute Manifestation Program
Improving your self esteem is all about removing the negativity in your head and shattering limiting beliefs that you hold. A program that can help you to do that easily is Eddie Sergey’s 15 Minute Manifestation.
When Sergey was a child he had a number of challenges to overcome. He was diagnosed with cancer and the doctors did not hold out much hope for him. His mother gave him some cassette tapes that contained binaural beats, and he listened to these continuously when he was in hospital. He recovered fully from the cancer.
Binaural beat technology is used in the audios of the 15 Minute Manifestation program. By listening to these binaural beats you will be able to connect directly with your subconscious mind. There are messages in the audios that connect with the “editor” in your subconscious and they will reprogram it with positives and eliminate the negatives.
All that you have to do is listen to three 15 minute long audios every day for 21 days. You will feel better after each session, and when the 21 days are up you will begin to see the effects of lasting change. You can transform your life with the 15 Minute Manifestation program, so find out more at the official review page here.
Take Action with these Self Esteem Building Activities
You will not improve your self esteem at all by just reading this post and then doing nothing. You need to put each one of these self esteem tips into action every day. These are really easy to do and you will start to feel the benefit straight away with some of them.
We would love to know your opinion on these self esteem building activities so please leave your comments below. We will respond to any questions quickly.